Automatic

4Thirteen years ago our youngest son died tragically and suddenly.  It took years to move forward without him, but in the early days after his death we were made aware of God’s presence with us by some of the special things He did to comfort us and assure us that our son was with Him.

One such occasion involved the word “automatic”.  We were standing graveside, trying to make sense of the name on the headstone.  It takes awhile to get used to the name of your child on a grave.  (The good news for those who grieve is that, eventually, you can move forward.  You’re not the same, and never will be, but you CAN rejoin the living).

I asked my husband, “Do you think that when I ask God to tell Mike that I love him, it’s a prayer that gets answered? ”

He responded, “I think it’s automatic.”

The next day I was writing my prayers in my journal. (It’s easier for me to concentrate that way.). I was asking God to tell my son that I loved him.  I looked up for a moment, and saw that the VCR was flashing the word “automatic”.  I looked back to my journal to record this unusual answer to prayer.  When I looked up again, the VCR was flashing the time…8:28.

There were other incidents during this time of fresh grief, when God went out of His way to show us His grace, comfort and peace.  I’ve found that as time goes on and I no longer need as much comforting, these little signs have ceased.  But the word “automatic” is always a reminder to me that I am never alone.

October 4